To Pop or Not to Pop….

That is the $64,000 belly button question in our household these days….

What do you think?  I have 7 more weeks and it still looks like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And I look like this:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Today I was told that I needed to decide when I was going on maternity leave…well, I wasn’t planning on that until the babe came…but they don’t want to pay for me and my temp person at the same time for longer than 2 weeks.  Which - I can understand - Which - I can’t understand why they would be paying all of these other people a gazillion times more than me and worry about maybe 3 or 4 weeks of total time paying 2 of me…This is the first time in a year that I have been pissed with them.  I don’t have any paid maternity leave…I can’t take off too much time and now I am taking the chance that I sit on my ass for 2 weeks waiting for babe to come which takes 2 weeks off the total time that I can afford to take off. 

I guess I should be grateful though that they want me back…especially since I am a contractor.  They could just wish me luck.

I did run into a couple of IT guys that I barage with requests and to do’s on an almost daily basis (or so it sometimes seems) and they asked me when I was leaving - I gave an update and they asked when my replacement was going to be coming on board.  I told them they only want 2 weeks of overlap time and they stopped dead in their tracks.  And then proceeded to go off about how there was no way that this person could get all the information/knowledge from me in 2 weeks….and how crappy their life is going to be when I’m not there.  Coming from two IT guys…and me not being IT…I’ll take that as a compliment. 

How much time did you take off when your babe arrived? 

I’m torn.

A time…

When we were living in KC, owned our house, were involved in things…I took great pride in keeping up our house, doing things, not sitting around like a schlep.  Yes - my house got dirty just like the next persons but it felt like a home, it felt comfortable, it felt, well - it felt perfect.

I think I hit upon something profound last night.  For the last year and a half - I’ve been depressed.  Granted, I’ve tried making our place a “home” but the feeling lasts for only a short period of time.  I’ll get the can of paint out - try and make a pleasing atmosphere…it lasts for a day and then I schlep.  I take care of bills, I do the dishes every once in a while, laundry too.  I’ve even been known to plant something in a pot and put it out on the deck.  But all in all - I work long hours - why?  Maybe because I don’t want to come back to this place and feel like I am a visitor, be alone. 

I think both Dodo and I have been feeling the same way for a while.  I’m not sure if it is because we were hoping that things would just be easy - like making friends, the city, etc.  Or because we are completely out of our element and bringing a baby into whatever it is that we do have.  It freaks me out that I feel this way and am scared that once this baby comes - I’ll be even worse.  That scares the shit out of me.  I don’t want to be depressed - I don’t want to feel worse with more of the post-partum depression.  I can’t do it. 

A time has come to make a change. 

I have 8 weeks to flip the mind around - flip the attitude around - flip the whole life.  This baby will not come back to a place where we feel like we are just visiting.  He will come back to a home. 

I am a complete believer in that if I have a messy, unorganized home then something is going on with me.  To me - it signals a problem - it signals a cluttered mind.  If you would take a look back at my life - when things were great - my bedroom was spotless, clothes organized, etc.  When it was crap - you could hardly see my bed.  Unfortunately, that “mind clutter” has seeped into my living room, kitchen, etc.  The clutter has to go - literally and figuratively. 

Each evening after work - not working late if I don’t have to - we are doing something around the house.  We are finishing the baby’s room.  We are actually going to use our kitchen and take the time to cook.  We are going to put things in boxes just to declutter.  We are going to get this space and our mind in a better place. 

A time has come.

Seriously

I’m making myself a t-shirt that I will start wearing to my office on casual Fridays.  Said t-shirt will have the following information:

1. No - I am not carrying twins

2. I’m due in 8 weeks & No, I’m still not carrying twins

3. No - my Dr. does not have the due date wrong - I know when I had sex and conceived - I was on fucking drugs - and it wasn’t pot.

4. I am absolutely positive that I am not carrying twins & No, one is not hiding behind the other because I had a fucking sonogram when I was less than 8 weeks pregnant and they don’t hide behind one another very well when they are that small - you fucking arse.

5. Do you really think that it is a good idea to ask me all these questions on a repeated basis?  Do you really think that it is any of your business to ask me if the Dr. has the date wrong?  Do you think if my Dr. did have the date wrong, they would be 2 months worth in the wrong?  And for your information you are half my height and besides being able to stomp on you with my left toe alone, I, of course, am probably bigger than you were when you were pregnant. 

6. And NO - after asking all these assanine questions - you may not touch my stomach.  What the hell would you want to for anyway?  To make sure that I actually have a baby in there?  Go jump out the window.

Okay - so that might be a little too much to put on one t-shirt….but seriously folks…I have run into a couple ladies recently that are just about where I am at in terms of weeks pregnant and guess what?  We all look about the same size!!! WTF?  Where are people getting their ideas about the “ideal” pregnant size?  Seriously.  I haven’t even gained the said 25-35 pounds yet…I probably won’t top out at 35lbs gained.  Even though I got some curves - I’m all baby. 

I actually don’t really have a problem when people make these comments…I do have a problem however, when the same fucking person makes them over and over and over….although, I do have to give her credit - at least she added a new one (the Dr. and due date one).

Seriously.

It was a tough day.  Felt like I got beat down with one thing or another.  I thankfully have Friday off - although I will be sitting with my laptop at the Dr.’s office for 4 hours taking my wonderful glucose test…and then I’ll have some time to myself and then back to the Doc’s for my regular appointment.  THEN - Dodo and I are going to The Police!  YEA!!!  We got the “cheap” tickets and are meeting a bunch of my co-workers.  Oh - and by the way - I guess I am totally cool that I would go to a concert 8 months pregnant.  Wow - I feel old. (I actually wanted to ask the person that said that if she knew who The Police were…but then I thought I would be dating myself even more and not getting the appropriate dig in that I wanted).

Seriously.

If your not judged by one thing - your judged by another. 

Seriously.

Pics of the sweet pea

So a while back we got 3-d photos of the sweet pea.  It was a super cool experience and for the most part he was very cooperative.  Besides the feet in the face hindering our chances for a real clear picture - it was awesome to see him moving around in 3-d. His feet were right in front of his face and his hands were on either side of his face for most of the time…so it made for some pretty interesting pictures…Enjoy

First view:

Sweet cheeks instead of sweet pea:

Very cool pic of his hand and arm - the video was really cool for this portion - we saw him opening and closing his hand (promise to cut the video down and post later):

He did manage to suck on his toes…very limber little boy:

This is a rendition of Munch’s “Scream”:

More sweet cheeks and hands around the face:

We managed to get a lot of the closet in the baby’s room cleaned out this weekend - guess the weekend isn’t quite over…I’ll be working on the rest this afternoon.  I’ve done a ton of laundry to get everything clean and not smelling like plastic or chemicals…criminy the carseat smelled.  I didn’t realize how much I’d be washing - and quite honestly it will probably be the first and only time some of this sees the inside of a washing machine.  I should have just loaded it all up and taken it to the laundromat. 

We did decide on having a Doula which is putting our minds at ease.  I know I won’t regret it especially since I’m going to try the natural way first…but that is all I’ll discuss because too many times people think I’m crazy - whatever.  The whole parenting thing - we’ll make our own decisions thank you - and don’t freak out if they aren’t what you would do.  Sorry - had to get that out without going to much into detail.  Anyway - I’m just excited to see him and hold him. 

In other news - not much.

Apartment Update #2

Full stop.  After about a month of having to deal with the soon to be ex of my friend…we too are ex’ing him for good reason and ex’ing the idea of doing the apartment.  It seemed like every day things that needed to be done “first” kept popping up that he hadn’t told us before - which made for our super-productive selves not being too productive for a month.  Actually - we were extremely productive for a month - trying to clean up his mess and organize the materials that we did have that were all over the place because he has no concept of organization, keeping things clean, etc.  We kept trying to push through it all and knew we could get it done but finally came to a cross-road ourselves last night and decided that we were just not going to get the return we wanted (i.e. saving money).  Totally sucks but it is okay.  So we will stay in the Beav for now until Dodo gets a great job and we move out of this place for real.

In other news.  The gestation of our child is going well.  I’m of course getting huge and he is moving like crazy…and it is beginning to look very alien - the belly rolls and punches bag when touched.  It is an awesome experience.  I was in KC several weeks ago to visit and while there my friends and Mom threw a baby shower.  It was great!  It was especially great because I had family in town as well that got to join in on the fun - and get this - they were in town because my Grandparents decided that instead of doing the Bike Across Kansas (BAK) they were doing the week-long Katy Trail ride/race.  My Grandparents people - how much activity do you do in a day?  Can you keep up with 80 year olds?  Biking?  I need to get my ass in gear.

So here are some pics of the fun:

The girls (most of them):

 

 

 

 

 

 

Two girls and a fussy guy (but aren’t they always?)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Me and the soon-to-be Granny B

 

 

 

 

 

 

Another girls pic (this time with Yaya):

 

 

 

 

 

 

The Pruetopians

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My auntie m and cuz k

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This weekend I think I will start getting the baby’s room ready…or somewhat ready….how ready can you get? 

 

New Beginnings

and crazy ideas….

So - I am about 29 weeks along in this pregnancy and tonight is the first night in months that I could not get to sleep.  It is about 1am PST and I’m downstairs with a cup of sleepy preggo tea and the computer.  It isn’t the type of missing sleep where you’ve worked hard all day and just can’t sleep…it’s the fall asleep on the sofa for a couple hours then try and go to bed I can’t sleep type of thing - which always sucks. 

My brain is on overdrive.  We are on a bit of overdrive right now so it is no surprise that my controlling, plan everything nature is stopping my ability to sleep - and the fact that the baby is sitting so low and my bladder can only hold maybe a 1/4 of a teaspoon.  I was tempted to do a headstand tonight just to get him a bit higher and off the bladder…I may do that still in the next few week - I’ll keep you posted if it works out.

Anyway, we are on overdrive.  We have decided to move out to the country.  A friend of mine who I absolutely adore, just finished building a house on top of this mountain down southwest of us.  The view is absolutely incredible.  You are royalty overlooking your subjects.  On a clear day you can see about 100 miles and the coastal range is in view and the entire valley.  She has an unfinished apartment above the detached garage that she has offered out to us free of rent if we build it out.  She isn’t on the property much right now and would like someone out there to watch over things and to help her take care of the place.  She is going through a divorce right now and her soon to be ex is still working on the place….and that’s where it gets interesting.  I spent all Friday afternoon and evening cleaning out the garage and organizing his tools and material that we will be using.  I swear he had five of everything in 12 different spots and only 1 was in working order.  The guy does not keep anything nice.  Doesn’t clean up his tools, puts crap in with good stuff, etc.  Just disturbingly unorganized and a bit trashy.  He has a “burn” pile which we use as a joke right now - if you don’t want something - throw it in the burn pile.  The problem is is that the burn pile is about 40 ft. from the apartment and surrounded by grass, brush, etc.  So we’ll see what else it burns.  Then the back of the garage looks like a white trash dumping ground…where he has also thrown really great wood away or laid it in a pile for mold and mildew to get to.  There is also about 12 bags of cement that were left out on a flat and they have probably been there for about oh ALL OF WINTER (i.e. rainy season).  So those babies aren’t going to be moved anytime soon. 

We are dependant on him to do the hard electrical and plumbing and trying to keep him on task for those things is turning out to be a chore.  He threw us a loop yesterday when he told us that prior to the final electrical inspection PGE had to come out and turn the power on because the inspector quite possibly would like to test the wires….and PGE may take a couple weeks….which we don’t have. So right now it seems the whole thing is hinging on whether or not PGE would like to come out next week and do this so we can do the final inspection on Thurs or Fri.  The guys even had my timeline of activities and schedule of what needed to be done when, etc. and he just managed to tell us yesterday abou this one detail that could quite possibly make or break the whole thing.  This though is apparently typical of the guy - watching him work…holy moly….he spent about 3 hours “designing” the staircase and doing measurements, etc.  The next day when we are out there to finish siding, it is as if he has no plan (which he couldn’t remember where he put it) so we are figuring out everything as we go anyway…which I knew would end up happening.  Although - Saturday we did get a lot done….siding is finished and the runner for a part of the stairs is attached to the building and the runners for the other portion are cut.  The concrete slab is down and looks damn good (this was another step that we didn’t know needed to be done).  All in all it was a productive day.  I was just thinking that the stairs could have been worked on a bit more.  Oh well. 

It isn’t a big space so we are trying to keep it as loft-like as possible.  The only true walls will be the bathroom that extend to the ceiling but the 2 bedrooms will be 3/4 walls.  Most of our stuff will be in storage and we will be living very minimalistic which I’m actually kind of looking forward to.  I look around our place right now and just can’t see why we have half the stuff we do…although I hate the place we are in right now.

If anyone would like to vacation in Oregon over the next few weeks - just let us know….we’ll put you up in the big house on the property and put you to work!  I am actually hoping to get one major working day where several of our friends said they would come out and help and get a bunch of stuff done.  That would be really nice.  We will be out there by August 1st and staying in the big house for a few week possibly.  We have to be out of here ASAP - they decided to raise the rent and now that we have given notice they want us to pay even more for the final month…hahahahaha I say to them.  We have no lease agreement right now (haven’t for 6 months) and they have accepted our payment thus far, binding them to that amount.  Try and fight me on this one stupid management company that raises rent on tenants that are employees as well!  Talk about taking a pay cut!

I don’t think the tea has hit me quite yet but I’ll see if the pillow helps at all.  Hopefully this wasn’t too terribly long but it caught you all up on what we are doing….well, sort of.  Dodo is loving flying of course and working his little butt off.  He takes extremely good care of me and I’m completely amazed that he actually said “yes” to this little idea of building an apartment during my 3rd trimester.  It is definitely nice to have someone who takes the leaps and bounds with you - and all in good stride.  I’m also keeping busy at work and still enjoying it.  I’ve been there for over a year and not bored yet.  The baby is cooking nicely.  He is moving quite a bit now which is a totally awesome feeling and one I am sure I’ll miss.  It was really great to do the 3d shots and just gave you a glimpse of who he is…and seeing him move was incredible.  We are just still trying to prepare for the arrival and trying to get all the stuff we really need.  He does have a crib now…no sheets or mattress but the wooden bars are ready for him.  I suppose we should work on getting that stuff!  I know I”ll probably start freaking about the beginning/mid of August when I realize I’ve completely been wrapped up in this project and have not paid any attention to what I need to get done in order to bring this kid home in some sort of no-chaotic state.  Well, I’ll at least try and pack my bag…

One view from the top of the driveway of the property.  The main house is in the picture.  I’ll get some more pics downloaded - from a clearer day. You are looking directly west in this picture.  There are vineyards below below us…past the property line and orchards on the other side of the road from the house.  Very tranquil.  I want to put a zipline down to the winery and then of course a gondola to get my ass back up the mountain.  Dodo is vying for a helipad…he’ll probably get that first before I get my zipline/gondola.  Our friend who owns the place is a fixed-wing pilot (getting her private)…and those damn pilots always stick together.

A story that will haunt my son…

If you haven’t been told or haven’t heard it thru the grapevine…our little baby girl is actually our little baby boy…We had a sono last Thursday and found out…and here is what I saw:

I thought that I was having an 8lb penis. 

I still wonder if the tech put “boy” there on purpose.

His actual manhood is the “cluster” by the ‘B’ (thank GOD).

Monday

Today is Monday.

I have nothing to write about.  The Sweet Pea is growing and so is the belly.  Work is work.  The dog and cat are fine.  Dodo is flying. 

Here are some pictures.  Everyone loves pictures.

But first we will start with a video. I love this video. It makes me laugh to the point of tinkling…and yes I know you’ll have to watch it sideways…just tilt your head.

 

Our funny girl Yaya turned 4 a couple of weeks ago…I can’t believe it! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Better than G-Dubya

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 Happy 4th Birthday sweet girl!  You have been quite the blessing in our life! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thoughtful

I got in the shower today and saw in the tub what appeared to be rocks.  I really couldn’t understand why there would be rocks in my tub.  I just stood there staring at this unusual site thinking that maybe the cat knocked over the fountain again and Dodo just threw everything in the tub to make it easy to clean up.  But then I thought that the rocks in the fountain (which is located on the fireplace mantle downstairs - and why if the cat knocked it down would you drag it all the way upstairs just to deposit rocks into the tub) were bigger than the rocks in my tub. 

I finally decided to pick up one of these rocks to see if a) they indeed came from the fountain or b) if they maybe came from one of our plants (we have no rocks in our plants but hey I was trying to think of every plausible explanation).  Upon this closer inspection (a soft squeeze) I realized that these were not rocks…it was poo.

I was very confused. 

The first thought that popped into my head was “what the hell was he thinking?”

The “he” being Dodo. 

I was trying to figure out why he would poo in the tub. 

Did he suddenly have a rectal attack and shoot out small stone size poo like a pellet gun from his butt AND didn’t bother to clean it up?  Did he do an overnight doodoo and dump it in the tub?

Several other scenarios of why Dodo would poo in the tub went through my head.   

I got out of the shower and went to get something to clean it up - all the while thinking of reasons as to why Dodo would poo in the tub. 

I cleaned it up and got back in the shower still trying to figure out why Dodo would poo in the tub.

I then switched gears for a few minutes and proceeded to think that maybe it was the Maggie B, a thought that I quickly dismissed because a) she is old and b) she hates the tub. 

So that made me go back to thinking it was Dodo.

It wasn’t until I was washing my hair that I thought of the Cat.  At this point I couldn’t figure out any reason what-so-ever as to why she would poo in the tub.  I could come up with a hundred and one reasons as to why Dodo WOULD poo in the tub, a hundred and one reasons as to why Maggie B WOULD NOT poo in the tub and only TWO reason why the cat would poo in the tub…

I thought she wanted to use the toilet and a) got confused or b) she wanted to use the toilet but figured the tub was more like her litter box because it was a bit more private (with the shower curtain and all).

I was about to dismiss this possibility, this most likely to happen possibility, this better than most likely to happen possibility when….

I realized that I had shut the spare bedroom door to keep Maggie B out…the spare bedroom that houses the litter box.  The door had been shut for a full day and full night.

I have a very thoughtful Cat.

To recap: I spent 10 minutes thinking of why Dodo would poo in the tub.  1 minute thinking of why Maggie B would never poo in the tub and 30 seconds thinking that the Cat was wanting to teach herself how to use the toilet.

In telling the story to Dodo, I realized that this scenario was very similar to my “Toaster Squirrel”.  The one where I was convinced that a squirrel had suddenly appeared over my toaster and was hopping rabidly about…and all it was was the piece of toast I had put in the toaster 3 minutes earlier.  I was really hoping to owe my confusion to the pregnancy…but since it appears that I tend to think this way normally…well…

Dodo was just glad that I would clean his poo for him. 

I can be thoughtful too.

My two babies that could not possible be the “Poo in the Tub” culprits…

 

 

Pictures

So - someone (Sa Rah) wanted some belly pics…so here they are:

This is from about 4 weeks ago (possibly longer) I can’t remember….

The next ones are at 18.5 weeks….

This is the “your taking a picture of me” pic

Now for the cuter (i.e. Normal) one…

So yes the belly has introduced itself.  Totally cool and totally weird.  There are some moments where I’ll feel completely hard around the belly and other moments where I wonder if anything is actually there because it is so soft…Having 4 months to go I am under the impression (with the ever expanding and rapidly expanding belly) that I will be one of those pregnant women who get frickin’ huge.  I’ve had more than 1 person ask me if I am having twins…Shit - am I THAT big…and then the looks of women’s faces after I tell them I am x-far along…could you please just smile and then gaffe afterwards???  Criminy people.  I am embracing the belly as it took almost 3 years to get this far…Just as long as the belly makes it’s exit soon after Sweet Pea is born.

We have our next ultrasound on May 1st - this is the anatomy one so we will be able to tell the sex (clearer) than the first (second) ultrasound that we had…and hopefully lay to rest my in-laws futile ramblings that it isn’t a girl…It is a girl…

But if it isn’t, well, I’ve already told Dodo that if I burst into tears at the Dr.’s to not be alarmed that I will get over it and come to terms that I will have to parent a boy…not that a boy wouldn’t be wanted (again we’ve tried for a while so whatever I get I’ll take and obviously love).  However, I know that we won’t have to go down this road because I am convinced that we are having a girl!

So here is my latest baby item purchased (actually Granny B purchased it)…It is a Moby and I know that I will fall in love with this thing…actually I already have as we tested it on the cat….The thing is so damn comfortable.  It looks a bit difficult to use but is really comfy on the back and everywhere and you can use it with the kiddo in several different positions.  The cat LOVED it.  She just totally chilled.

Please ignore the hat as I had been wearing a ball cap all day and was still trying to get over being sick and had just woken up from a nap…

Here are some latest Yaya pictures…She just turned 4 last Saturday.  I can NOT believe she is getting bigger.  It still breaks my heart that we are not near her to see her grow…so I’m not saying anything more about it. 

These are of when Dodo was in KC visiting his Momma Dode for her birthday.  He was able to spend a little time with Granny B and Yaya before they took him to the airport.  The panda she has is from when I was in town and we were baby shopping - she was such a good sport that she got a new stuffed animal…and she had to have her own panda since we have our Panda (the cat).

This next one is from when I was there with her - she has her own candle from 5B…and loved it…but it had to go on top of her head…

And here are some shots from “girls” night….

Next is Granny B and Yaya in Granny B’s office…her office rocks by the way…awesome views…

Panda on the belly…

Just chillin’