I know, I know – you all think I am terribly great at this whole blog thing and when was the last time I posted??
Two weeks until we are in KC for a visit – and believe me it won’t be long enough!  I’m still not really in love with Portland.  I love Portland because any fair-skinned, strawberry blonde girl that hates hot weather would.  This is the perfect climate for me.  However, I just need to move my entire life, friends, family and a couple of BBQ restuarants up here – then I would be IN LOVE with Portland.

Speaking of BBQ – when we lived in KC, we probably had BBQ about once or twice a year…otherwise, we frequented the new restuarants and old restuarants that are non-BBQ that make up the superb dining experience in KC.  We are not die-hard BBQ people…but living out here – we have NO, NONE, ZERO, ZIP BBQ and we are craving some good ‘ol KC BBQ.  For an entire year we have been on the look-out for BBQ restaurants and for a whole year we have not found any until a month ago.  We were told that WE HAD TO go to this great little dive that is owned by Snoop Doggs’ Uncle.  It was a bit of southern cooking but we could get actual real BBQ. 

When the stomach craving got to be too much we ventured out to Snoop Doggs’ Uncle’s place – Roy’s Ribs.  This place is a crap-hole – this place is NOT a dive.  First, we stand in line waiting to give our order and notice that after each person gives the ONE girl working their order she just sits it aside in a pile.  Once we got up there there are about 5 orders just sitting there.  We place our order and were really excited because we could get BBQ beef and THREE sides for $8.00.  I thought we would just get small small portions…so I was waiting to be too excited.  After placing the order we go find a place to sit – in a back room that is filled with Snoop Dogg posters and other performers in line with Snoop Dogg.  It is filthy back there.  We wait and wait and wait and then decide to just have them make it “to go” and we go tell the girl and then decide to wait in the front room for our food.  Unfortunately, the only place to sit is a rotten couch that I am desparately afraid is going to give me the plague but standing was not an option either.  So, I sat there rigid waiting 45 minutes for my food. 

I scarf down the cornbread, which was good, then wait to eat the rest at home.  We get home and can’t believe that there is so much meat!  We are talking about 3 lbs. of meat in each meal.  I am salivating and start in on this fabulous BBQ.  It is shite!  Absolute SHITE!  I spit out what I am trying to eat and think that I’ll try another bite and see if I was just unlucky the first time getting all the gristle and fat…nope – the second bite was shite as well.  Dodo ended up having to get a knife and just start cutting the fat off the meat.  But even then – there was so much fat in the meat muscle I couldn’t eat it.  Between the two of us we threw away 5.5lbs of shite BBQ. 

And let us not forget about the sides…BBQ beans, cornbread and coleslaw.  Well, the BBQ beans tasted EXACTLY LIKE pork and beans out of the can – literally out of the can!  Remember when you though that pork and beans would be okay RIGHT OUT OF THE CAN and realized that the beans were a little chalky?  Well, that is what we had.  They were cold and had the distinct taste of pork and beans out of the can-no BBQ sauce involved, no cooking, just can opener and dump.  The coleslaw was nasty as it was pretty much just sliced cabbage.  Nothing on it, none of the creamy sauce, NOTHING.  The only good thing was the cornbread – and quite frankly the non-baker that I am could have made better!!!!

So-one of the first things I am doing when I get home is eating some BBQ.  And seeing how much I can ship back home.

If anyone wants to start a restuarant in Portland…you would make a mint out here.

 And I’ll probably be dead tomorrow considering that I just completely bashed Snoop Doggs’ Uncle’s restaurant.

Anyway, on to other things.  Dodo is almost done and will finish up after we get back from KC.  One of the guys that does the check-rides isn’t available so it will just be better to hold off until then.  That is exciting.  It also looks like the school will be hiring here again so – please pray to whomever you choose that he gets the job!

KC here we come….

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3 Comments on “Hello”

  1. Tea~! Says:

    Oh, Honey! We’ll take you to Oklahoma Joe’s when you get here — the only BBQ worth eating in the gas satation (where it is housed!)

  2. Tea~! Says:

    Oh, Honey! We will take you to Oklahoma Joe’s when you arrive — the only BBQ worth eating there on the the spot (in the gas station!)

  3. sarah Says:

    I hope OK Joe’s treated you right! I’m in love with that pulled pork sandwich. Did you get any sauce to take with you? It will make homemade meat taste a little more like KC.

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