25 Months

My Darling Child,

You are two years old and one month…It is really hard for me to believe. We celebrated your birthday here at the house and the very next day left for Portland on what would be a remembrance trip for me. But I’ll save that for another day.

Two. You are talking non-stop and love anything train or Star Wars. I decided that you needed to start going to bed by yourself – the rocking to sleep has ceased – which makes me sad in a way but I know that you need to learn that you are good on your own as well. I don’t really get to hold you much although I have noticed that you come to me more often during the day to get hugs or kisses. So it balances out.

We just got back from San Diego where we went on several adventures. I took you to Legoland where you loved the mini-Lego area where they had replicas of Georgetown and Washington Monument and the White House as well as New York, Statue of Liberty and Vegas. You were enthralled. We probably spent a good hour just in that area! We got to go on some rides and you especially loved the airplane ride where I let you sit in the front all by yourself…I sat behind you and hung on to you at first and slowly let go as you screamed in laughter and the thrill of the ride. We went to the USS Midway and spent a good three hours there looking at every plane and helicopter on the flight deck, climbing in and out of several different cockpits and looked at all the boats and ships passing by. We went to Balboa park, where you slept the entire time so I got to do some things that I wanted to do like go to the Museum of Photographic Arts and sit out at the amphitheater and listen to someone practicing the pipe organ hidden behind the walls. Your Nanna joined us after a few days and we went to the zoo where you loved watching the elephants and giraffes. We went to Disney Land but none of us really liked it that much…not what I expected at least. We ate at some great Mexican restaurants and we got to see your Daddy’s family including your Uncle and Aunt. We did so many things each day and you loved all of it.

Traveling by ourselves is getting easier. It was pretty much you and me for the past month traveling by ourselves. It really isn’t that hard other than some sleep deprivation. The hard part to get over is not having your Dad here to share it with. Having to ask strangers to take our picture as they look at us and wonder what the situation is…I want to tell them, tell them that I am not divorced, I’m not a nanny. I’m a widow trying to live life with my son. I just don’t like those looks but at the same time I want everyone in the world to know because I don’t want to lose sight of your Dad.

We do a good job, you and I. It is very relaxed and easy and fun. We have a good time. I’m so thankful that I am able to do these things with you.

You started making funny faces. You stick your fingers in your mouth and pull your mouth wide. It is so funny and you end up cracking yourself up. You are still my helper and you love order. You know how to put your shoes on and take them off. Same with your shirt and pants. Socks give you a little trouble but you get them eventually. You love to have anyone play with you. You are constantly asking ‘play with me?’ as you cock your head to the side and hold out your hand…who can resist. In the mornings you come into bed with me and you press your nose against mine and ask ‘awake?’ and even if I say no…you giggle and ask again. You love butterfly kisses and eskimo kisses. When you kiss me you start with one cheek and then go to the other, then it is my nose, my chin and my forehead and then you say ‘hug’.

Over the past month on our two trips, several people have noted how easy of a kid you seem to be. That you are always happy and just really easy going. I have to agree and am so thankful for this. I’m not sure if I would be this together this past year if you were a difficult or unruly child. You make things easy and fill my sad moments with laughter.

Tonight as we were playing and you came to me for a hug and kiss, I felt this overwhelming sense of love. I fall in love with you more and more each day. You are a brilliant boy and I am so proud of you.

I love you.

In this life and the next,

Your Momom

Explore posts in the same categories: Flying Dodo, Lido, Widowhood

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